In everyday life, it’s often good to say “I don’t know.” It is humble. It shows a beginner’s mind. It allows you to be open to an answer. Lately in class we have been looking at what saying “I don’t know” does when it comes out as a reflex and why, in some cases, it’s better not to say anything until you know!
It’s important as an actor to have a reaction or opinion about what’s happening around you. We tend to skate over our instinctive reactions to things in everyday life. Sometimes we lose touch with the fact that we do actually feel something about what’s happening around us. In order for students to become aware of their opinions about things, I will ask students how they feel about something that’s just happened. I’m not too concerned with what the feeling is: it can be anything. Just that they aren’t glossing over and not taking in what just happened. So often we reflexively say “I don’t know” as a filler while we try to think of something deeper to say. I do it too!
The problem with this reflex in this situation is that by saying “I don’t know” our subconscious feels like we’ve answered the question and stops looking for a deeper answer. This allows our brain to take over and give an intellectual response: a response that doesn’t come from our guts; a controlled response. This kind of response, while it may be truthfully what we think, isn’t all that useful to us as actors where we need to be working with our instinctual, gut emotional responses to things. (As actors, we do need intellect when we’re working on a script or thinking up a circumstance: before we start living out the situation. The intellect during the scene will either come from the author or from the circumstance that we previously thought up. Either way, the intellect doesn’t help us feel more deeply about anything in the moment).
Instead of using “I don’t know” as a filler answer to the question “How do you feel about that?”, stop. Don’t say anything for a while and let the question seep into your gut. You might not feel anything at first. That’s fine. Wait. Be patient with the answer. We do have opinions about things and those opinions often surprise us. By making it a habit to wait until you find your feeling or opinion about something rather than answering the question quickly, you will start to recognize your opinions more easily and the time between the question being asked and you having a real gut answer will get smaller and smaller until asking the question is unnecessary (because you can’t help but express your opinion when the thing happens!).